May Skater of the Month: Dragon Ballzy

Dragon Ballzy, or as she is also known, Katey, is a blocker and, as of late, a jammer for the Dire Skates. Though she just joined in 2013, she has clearly has a natural talent for derby as she has shown great improvement in the short time she has been on the track with the team.

Ballzy is always smiling and willing to geek out with her fellow sisters at practice, making her a wonderful, positive energy on the team, but she is also a force on the track. She hits hard, falls hard, and plays hard for her team. To illustrate, Ballzy scored more points for us in the last away bout than any other jammer. She works hard to improve her skating and it shows!

Off the track is an artist who just so happens to also make pizza to support her derby habit.


Here is what our coach, The Golffather, had to say about Ballzy:

 "Dragon Ballzy is up and comer for the Dire Skates. She is coming into her own and coming out of her shell. She has been known to make the big hit and recently she has been starting to jam. Most of the time you see a jammer that is small and agile, well "Ballzy" isn't the smallest skater or the most agile but she can make her own hole. It will be fun to see where she can go from here as long as she puts the time and effort into it."


RollHer Zombie had this to say: 

"I dig Katey's skate or die attitude. She has improved tremendously and I love to watch her skate. She is easygoing, always a total sweetheart, and always a total badass. I <3 her so hard"


BadAZZ MotherCutter added this:

"Ballzy is an amazing person and a great player. She's a sweet person, but don't let her smile fool you. Her skills have improved tremendously since she started with the team. I very much enjoy having her both on the track and as a friend"

Thanks for all you do, Ballzy!

Derby love

Vet Profile: Emily KickNsuM

Name: Emily KickNsuM 

Number: 31 

Position: Jammer/ Blocker 

Signature move: Backwards blocking/ penalty box sitting 

Tell us about your non-derby self: I’m a surgical nurse, wife, mom to a weimaraner named Jack, Zumba fanatic, fisherwoman, bargain hunter, cancer survivor, and a bad cook. 

Why did you join roller derby?: I will do anything as long as I can wear my roller skates.


What is your favorite part of roller derby?: Feeling that I belong 

What are your roller derby goals?: To have fun while doing good things for my community. I would really like to see us become a recognized not-for-profit organization in this community. 

What do you hope Dire Skates can do for Richmond?: I would like for the Dire Skates to be a fun, entertaining group that people can be fans of, knowing that we do more than just skate, and knowing we work to help others and organizations in the community. Most importantly, I want the Dire Skates to make a difference in Richmond. 

What are you skating on right now?: Vertigos with custom-mounted pink crazy plate thanks to Malice B Stopless.

 If you could skate anywhere, anytime, where and when would it be and why?: Wouldn’t matter as long as I had good friends, good music, and skates, I’d be a happy girl. 

If you could have any famous person alive or dead join Dire Skates, who would it be and why?: I don’t know….. Shaq, he could take up a lot of room on the track and I just see him knocking some girls down and them not getting back up. 

Tell us one thing you want us to know about yourself: Growing up I really wanted to be a mailman. 

Tell us one thing about another skater: Korah the Destroy actually thought about having her derby name be Korah KickNsuM, which I think is really cool.

So you wanna derby...

Have you thought about joining derby?

(If you've ever been to a bout, then answer is very likely a resounding "YES!").

Well, we are holding tryouts on June 22nd and 29th and we would love to have you join us!

Here are a few things you should know about our tryouts and joining derby in general. 

1. It's okay if you can barely skate (or cannot skate at all). We will train you. Even if you cannot roll around the track without falling a billion times, you can join if you want it bad enough. You will have a tougher time in the beginning, but derby is all about working hard to get what you want.

2. You should be exercising. Now. I should be exercising instead of writing this blog. We make a lot of what we do on the track look pretty easy, but unless you are getting some cardio in or going to Zumba or lifting weights (or all of the above!), you are probably not going to be fully prepared for the level of physical activity required for derby. It's nice out. Go for a walk, do some squats (they are your friend), and strengthen that core! You need a strong butt to hit people with so get to work! Additionally, The Skate has summer hours so if you'd like to get time in on wheels, do it!

3. You will have fun. We are hilarious and stinky and hilarious. We will make sure you feel comfortable during tryouts and afterward, but please come with a good attitude, come ready to learn, and come ready to make friends!

4. Wear comfy clothes. It is hot in The Skate (the word "Mordor" is spoken at least thirty times during each summer practice), but you also need to be able to move around and fall in your clothes.

5. We will provide skates and gear for your tryouts ONLY. Bring your own mouth guard (I will gladly share my stinky knee pads with you for tryouts, but I barely know you so sharing a mouth guard is really pushing it. $2 at Walmart will do for now. Skaters and The Skate staff can help you order gear and skates that will work well for you and within your budget.

6. You will smell awful because you will be sweaty and because you will be borrowing a stinky vet's gear. Derby stank is real.

7. You will fall. And you will get up. And you will fall again. We will teach you to fall correctly before we teach you to do much else. Safety first. 

8. You should be watching roller derby. Come to our bout on May 10th if you can! But there are so many bouts streamed online through DNN, there is a wealth of derby (women's and men's!) within about an hour of here. One blog provides .gifs of cool plays, interesting footwork, or to illustrate specific rules. It helps! And it's fun!

8. Did I mention that it will be fun?! I am serious. Everyone is so nice and we genuinely want you to join us on the track and in this whole crazy thing we call derby. 

There are other things you can do like start thinking of your derby name or stock up on cool socks and tights, but ultimately, come prepared and make sure you feel comfortable.

If you want more info, message us on Facebook, email us at thedireskates@gmail.com, or talk to your favorite roller girl.
We can't wait to see you!

--Bilbo Stabbins