Derby Unicorn Spotlight: Mr. BadAZZ

Editor's note: Roller derby requires more than just the players on the track. It requires NSOs, referees, coaches, people to set up, volunteers to run the tables, food vendors, and on and on. This is why we are starting a new feature showcasing the people who work behind the scenes to help bring you Richmond's Derby Little Secret.

Mr. BadAZZ, or Tony, is the assistant coach of the Dire Skates (or as we affectionately refer to him: Ass. Coach). Tony has been with the team for two years. He helps run practices, referees scrimmages, runs drills with us as a skater, and bench coaches during our games, among countless other duties.

Tony is only one part of Dire's BadAZZ clan, which also features BadAZZ MotherCutter, Baby BadAZZ, and BadAZZ Brat.

Tony not only helps physically with drills and practices, but he also provides support as a coach and friend. Tony does a great job of providing positive support and constructive criticism, always helping us improve our game individually and as a team.

Tony is one of Dire's biggest fans, too--if you ever see him out and about it's likely that he will be sporting Dire attire.


Terahrizen, team trainer, and skater for the Dire Skates says:

Organization and knowing who works best together and who to to put against certain walls is huge, and its a lot for one person to do. Having  a bench coach has really put the Dire Skates in motion for many improvements. Tony is a particularly valuable piece because he takes the time to get to know us all personally and really has an eye for detail and a passion for derby. I trust him (and Coach) to keep an eye on me while I'm on the track and listen for their instructions.

BadAZZ MotherCutter, Mr. BadAZZ's wife, said this:

Hmmm....what to say.  Mr. BadAZZ is an athlete in every aspect of the word.  Mr. Competitive. He strives to make me a better player. Tony wants to help build Dire into a better, stronger team. I love the fact that we can make roller derby a family event.  We enjoy every activity we do together and this is just one facet of what we call Team Tenney.  He loves to cheer for our team and he applies his sports knowledge in everything we do.  He is a very positive person, very encouraging.  He wants to be supportive of all of us as a team. I appreciate everything he does.

The GolfFather, the other half of the Dire Skates' coaching staff, said this:

Man, what an addition to have Tony or Mr. Bad Azz to the coaching staff. He is instrumental on keeping the bench in order during games, so I can focus on the track. He gets in scrimmages with the ladies and brings a different dynamic because if they can hold him back or knock him out of the way can do it to most anyone. I appreciate everything he does on and off the track. Thank you for being a great coach and a great friend.

Mr. BadAZZ photo gallery:

Bench coach

Promotional photo shoot

With Smack Widow

Mr. BadAZZ and his wife BadAZZ MotherCutter

Thanks for all you do, Ass. Coach!

April Skater of the Month: Maniac Jack

Maniac Jack has been with the Dire Skates since the beginning! A blocker, and jammer, Maniac is a powerful force on the track.

I mean, have you seen her skate?

And those shoulders?!

Maniac skates hard and hits harder, not only using herself to hit our opponents, but even throwing her teammates at the other players. No one forgets the first time they get hit by Maniac Jack.

Maniac easily gets her head into the game and works to ensure her teammates are focused alongside her. Though she is also well-known for stacking up penalties--the "jack in the box" is a common sight at our games. Even then she still has a smile on her face!

Maniac is a powerful asset to our team, not only because of her abilities, but because she is an amazing derby sister. She even tried to retire after last season, but we would not let her because we just love her too much!


Coach, The GolfFather, had this to say about Maniac:

What an amazing person Maniac Jack is. She is hard working, busy mom of two very active and athletic kids. Jack is very athletic herself and a very good skater. She has played anywhere we have put her on the track. Blocker, no problem, Pivot, sure, Jammer, "are you sure?", “Yes, Jack, go jam and score some points.” She is most famous probably for Hurtz McGroin’s saying “Jack in the Box” everytime she gets a penalty. Wonder if they would sponsor our penalty box?
She almost retired after last season and I am glad we had all those fans in supporting the “one more year.” I am glad that she is back for 2015 and hopefully beyond. What do you say, Jack?
I have known jack for about 4.5 years now and I am honored to coach a great player, teammate, mom, person, but most of all a great friend!

DJ SMear-O added this:

I love Maniac's glorious powerful ass. It knocks everyone around. It clears holes for me on the track. It looks perfect and round and strong in her shorts. I catch myself in a Maniac Jack booty trance. She may not like her fabulous bottom, but that beautiful badass babe has been busting her bodacious buns for me and everyone else on this team since we became a team. She is a bounty of butt and a force to be reckoned with. I love Maniac Jack. Skating with her has and always will be a pleasure.

RollHer Zombie had this to say about her derby sister:

Maniac Jack, 765, homegrown crazy. I remember drinking wine in her kitchen many moons ago and trying to come up with her tag line. That is just one of many great times we have shared since the very start of the team. Besides my other wife, CA is probably who I have played derby with the most since the team started. I am lucky to not only call her my sister, but one of my dearest, closest friends, who has been there for me through my darkest moments. Manic and I both can say derby saved our souls; Not only for the physical outlet and chance to break down barriers that society puts females in, but the true friendship and love that comes from such an amazing dynamic of women. Some people are reluctant to get to know her, because I think they are intimidated by those big shoulders, lethal hips, and sometimes big mouth. ;) I know under that awesomely brutal persona and seemingly effortless derby ability, she is quite simply amazing. I know she has thought of retirement, but honestly I can't imagine our team without her and I am not looking forward to that day. Mad love for you Maniac.
<3 RollHer Zombie

Maniac Jack photo gallery:

Thanks for all you do, Maniac!

Spotlight: Grizzly Barrett

Check out that fierce helmet Grizzly painted!

Name: Grizzly Barrett 

Number: 046 

Position: Blocker 

Tell us about your non-derby self: By day or sometimes night I am a radiology student. I take x-rays and try to make people feel even a tiny bit better about their hospital stay. In my spare time, besides derby, I have several different hobbies. I love to paint, draw, and do all things artistic. I also love to be outdoors hiking, swimming, or lazing about. People say I have a song for every situation. I love to sing, and random spoken words may or may not cause me burst out in song. 

Were you a fan of the Dire Skates before joining? I hadn’t actually ever been to a game before I joined the Dire Skates. 

Why did you join roller derby?: I joined roller derby because I wanted to become a stronger me. Part of it was just to prove to myself that I could, and then I fell in love with derby.

What is your favorite part of roller derby?: My favorite part of roller derby is getting to know and being around all of my amazingly strong teammates. They have really supported me, some of them literally pushing/pulling me along, when all I wanted to do was give up. 

What are your roller derby goals?: After passing my laps, my biggest goal is to learn as much about the game as I can. I also want to work more on transitions and backwards skating. 

What do you hope Dire Skates can do for Richmond?: I just hope more girls will join and have a healthy outlet to express themselves. I know when I’ve had a bad day; a roller derby practice is the quickest cure. 

What are you skating on right now?: A pair of used Riedell Carrera’s I picked up online for $5. Best deal ever! They needed a few alterations, new homemade straps and bigger shoe strings, but they’ll do until I get some new ones. 

If you could skate anywhere, anytime, where and when would it be and why?: I wish I could skate around the town I live in, but the roads are way too rough and there aren’t any paved trails. 

Tell us one thing you want us to know about yourself: I’m super loyal and will stick by my friends and family no matter what. 

Tell us one thing about another skater: All of my teammates have been amazing, but Terah pushed me super hard to pass my laps and she’s an awesome trainer!

March Skater of the Month: Emily KickNsuM

Emily is a Dire Skates Original; she joined when the team started five years ago! She has been blocking and jamming for the Dire Skates since the beginning. Emily is a naturally good skater and is, as anyone who has watched her knows, wonderful to watch on the track.

Emily's team job is bout-coordinator, meaning she coordinates getting everything planned, reserved, and prepared for bout day. Emily is also a trainer (alongside her derby wife RollHer Zombie), meaning she helps to teach new skaters skating and derby basics, but also helps the other vets hone their skills.

Emily welcomes dedicated players with open arms, helping them learn, but also showing them what to strive for. In addition to her derby skills, Emily is a joy to be around.

Our coach, The GolfFather, had this to say:

"Emily KickNsum grew up a rink rat and put her work as a skater into that of a derby girl. She has a very demanding job as an ER nurse and I think relieves and lets go of all that on the derby track. Emily is a triple threat on the track. She is a great jammer even though she doesn’t like to. She is a ultimate blocker that can keep girls contained for a long time and as a pivot is a big leader on the track. Emily has done a lot off the track as well behind the scenes. She has done fundraising events, handled getting NSO’s, getting everything set with the different venues that we have used for games. She has been a leader on and off the track and has scaled back her responsibilities from the past few years but that doesn’t mean she is any less important to this team. I am glad that I can coach her and more importantly call her a great friend."

Fellow skater, DJ SMear-O, said this:

"She's been dedicated to this team since it's inception. She's part of coaching and training and teaches us all so much. She encourages and inspires and smells awful. She helps put bouts together. She's always got a silly attitude. Stupid, ugly, happy holiday sweaters...she's known for those. She's fun. She's kickass and one of our founding sisters. She's got more skating ability in her pinky toe than I could ever dream to have. And "hot" doesn't begin to cover it. She's amazeballs. And I'm glad she's my sister from another mister...and missus :)"

Emily's little derby sister, Terahrizen, had this to say:

"When I tried out for the team I remember looking around at all the vets and wondering which one would be my "Big". Emily walked in late and I think it was really nice to see her in street clothes because it made her "real". The other girls were all geared up and going drills and that was both amazing and terrifying. Emily talked to me very briefly and it was very calming to be approached by Emily Talbot rather than Emily KickNsum. When I got the call that she actually would be my Big, I was very happy. I learned that she was practically born with skates on her feet and was one of Dire's best players. I had to step it up and make my sister proud!

Emily is very dedicated to the sport and her team mates despite what may be going on in her life outside of derby. I respect that about her. I appreciate the quiet encouragement and the over all support she has given me. The first time I ever went to the gym, Emily invited me to go to some insanely difficult class, it was probably called something like "do burpees and core work until you die." I didn't realize it at the time, but I really needed the gym to improve my game. I am absolutely proud to call her my sister and watching her skate is definitely one of my favorite things. Skating along side her is even better. If I'm jamming, I know she's got my back and I'm not worried how big the other team is or how good they are. I also love her attitude about games, she constantly says "I'm having fun. Lets just worry about having fun and staying together!" I think a lot of new skaters look up to her, while we can't all be born on skates the way Emily was, we all admire her drive and natural ability. She has been really tough on me as her little, and I have a long way to go, but I wouldn't be where I am today without her!"

Emily's derby wife, RollHer Zombie had this to say:

"My beautiful wife, man where do I even start. A heart as big as the hits she doles out on the track. Equal parts beauty and Braun. I absolutely love watching her skate and play the game, almost as much as I love sharing the track with her. Emily being so much younger than me, I use her to gauge my own performance, she definitely keeps me on my toes and pushing.  She is a bulldog on wheels and I have nothing but respect and love for her, quit isn't in her vocabulary.  We have both grown up skating and we love it.  Derby gives us that outlet to bring it to that next level. I look forward to many more years on the track with her by my side.  Love your face off Em!
<3 RollHer Zombie"

 Emily KickNsum photo gallery:

Thanks for all you do, Em!

January Skater of the Month: Jenocide

Jen, or Jenocide, is a blocker for the Dire Skates. She joined the team in June of 2013; her eagerness to skate quickly became dedication to the team--this dedication only continues to grow.

Jenocide works hard both on and off the track and it shows. Not only has she grown as a player, but she has worked hard to become fit and healthy through derby and through her own workouts. Fitness and health are a priority. Because of this, she pushes her teammates to do better and become stronger.

In addition to skating, Jen helps coordinate community events and helps in any way she can behind the scenes (you've even seen her here on the blog a couple of times). 

Jen rarely misses practices or team events, even attending practices when she is sick or injured and cheering us on from the side. Jen's dedication makes her a great teammate and friend and we are glad she is a part of the Dire Skates.





Our coach, the Golffather, had to this to say:

Jen or Jenocide as the derby world knows her is a up and coming skater. Jen started with a team that is no longer in existence. I know that she is the most dedicated skater that we have on the team. Her attendance record is impeccable to the point of being almost perfect since she joined the team. I think she has maybe missed less than a handful of them.
She works very hard both on and off skates. She continues to improve her skills on the track and listens and gets better each time. With everyone she has things that she needs to work on and get better at. This has been her first full season with us and she has learned a lot and will hopefully learn that much more this next season. Jen, thank you for balancing your job, kids, family and becoming a member of the Dire Skates.

Shinnanigans, Jen's friend and former coach, said this:  
 

Jenocide possesses the keys to success. She understands that knowledge and learning are not enough. It takes action.  Action on and off the track. She continuously works on improving her skills, getting stronger and healthier. Her dedication to her team and sport show every time she takes the track. It is a great feeling to see her succeed through the progress she has accomplished.

BadAZZ Mother Cutter, Jen's derby sister, said this:

Jen has come SO far since joining the team. She is very dedicated and always there when you need her. She takes direction well and plays hard. She's a great example of what a new player can strive toward.

Smack Widow, Jen's derby sister, said this:

Passion and dedication are words that can be used to describe Jenocide. Since the beginning of our skating career and even more to this day Jen inspires me. She is one of the hardest workers on the team, and always gives her 100%. During practices her dedication really shows. She is constantly pushing herself past her own limits, physically and mentally. She is like a force that cannot be moved. Her skating and game play have improved immensely since starting out, and her body has changed and developed into what she needs to thrive on the track. Her beautiful transformation into the player she is today gives me and everyone else on the team inspiration to keep pushing. The Dire Skates would absolutely not be the same without her.

Jenocide photo gallery:

Thanks for all you do, Jen!

December Skater of the Month: Lish D Lish

Alicia, or Lish D Lish, is a jammer for the Dire Skates. Lish has been with the team for four years-- her dedication to the team evidenced by her time with the team and her amazing performance every time she hits the track.


Lish is one of our star jammers and one of our most recognizable players not only because of her seemingly natural ability as a skater and jammer, but because of her her obvious love of the game. She is always willing to take pictures with her fans after the game, showing off the smile that rarely seems to leave her face.


If you were at our game against A-Town on November 15th, you saw all of this in action. Lish played her heart out just as she always does!


Instead of telling you about her skills, I will let others explain how valuable she is to the team.




Our coach, the Golfather, had to this to say:

Alicia, or, as everyone in the local derby community knows her as, Lish D Lish is a great skater and is improving every time that she laces up her skates. She listens well and takes what us coaches tell her to heart. For those who were at the November game, Lish probably played her best overall game. We had to control her emotions a few times, but that just shows that she has the heart for the game and wants to do her best. She has also had to overcome a few injuries. With a few added tools to her game she could be a huge threat on the jammer line for us.

Stubborn Itch, Lish's derby wife said this:

What can I say? If some of you didn't know, Lish is my derby wife and always will be no matter what. Not only my derby wife but, dancing partner, close friend, and side kick. When Lish first came to the team, I remember her try-outs were very impressive! You could tell she was a skater! During try-outs she didn't show any shyness. It was all confidence and determination. She is a people-person, dedicated, very tough, and a confident woman. Lish is always wearing a smile even on her worst days. I knew we would hit it off because she has those outbursts sometimes. That told me she is as real as real can get. No cover up on who she is really is. Her skating skills have always been extremely excellent, but if you know derby, we all know that derby is a different style from casual skating. With that being said, since on the team Lish's skating skills have gotten even better. I will let you all in on a little secret that even Lish didn't know. Lots of us know how ridiculously fast Lish is. Well, being able to skate with her on the track during practices has helped me achieve a goal that I set for myself. I set the goal that I would be as fast as her one day! Not sure that I have completely accomplished her speed yet, but I have achieved it to the point I am happy with myself and she is all the one to thank for that. So I personally want to thank her for that! Lots of people and new skaters look up to her for her skating skills, dedication, determination, toughness, confidence, and always wearing a beautiful smile on her face. Congratulations on working hard enough to get noticed to be the team's skater of the month!

I'm so very proud of you and keep up the good work! I love you!

Shelby, Lish's sister, added this:

I am proud of Alicia. She has came so far in her skating career. She is the Michael Jordan of this game. It is amazing being a twin with Alicia because together we can do anything. There have been many times when Alicia's fans have come up to me asking for an autograph. I smile and tell them "I am not Alicia, but I will tell her you said hi." The street goes both ways people come up to Alicia and able her about fixing automobiles and riding a motorcycle. She kindly apologizes and says, "No, I am not Shelby, but I will tell her you said hi." I am proud of Alicia and I believe that the rest of the family is also. Keep it up, Alicia.!

Maniac Jack, added this about her derby sister:

jam skating might be her groove, but she has fast moves on the flat track. Over the years of skating with Lish one things comes to mind: she always has a smile on her face. And she is one hell of a jammer. Okay, that was two. There is more--Lish might be little, but she is mighty. Even in practice she will take a beating and come back for more. To end this I have to say I have never been more excited than when I saw her hip check the other jammer during our last bout. Thanks for being my teammate and derby sister!

Here are a few photos from our bout against A-Town that show Lish in action, but you can check out more photos here:

Thanks for all you do, Lish!

Clinics and Tryouts

We are still riding high on our recent win against A-Town. What a great game! The score was so close throughout and we took a win only at the every end. And what a great group of ladies!

We hope you enjoyed the bout as much as we did...and maybe now you are thinking you might even like to play roller derby. We would love for you to join us on the track!

Photo credit John Wijsman

You are in luck!

We are holding skating clinics on the following Sundays 4-6pm at The Skate:

• November 30th 
• December 7th
• December 14th

We realize that you might have some hesitations and we are here to help. If you haven't skated since 10th grade, are convinced you are not the most graceful of people, or maybe have some skill, but would like to get some practice in, these clinics are for you!

Come on out to work on basic skating skills and see how we run our regular practices.

You can borrow skates and gear to start (though you will need to bring your own mouth guard, which can be purchased for a few bucks at Walmart), but you must be prepared to buy skates and gear if you want to continue. The staff at The Skate will help you order what you need because, let's face it, there are a lot of choices and things get confusing.

What my hair looks like after derby practice

We will hold tryouts on January 4th and 11th. I have previously written about how to prepare for tryouts, but I would like to add: "attend our clinics" to that list. Though you do not have to attend the clinics in order to attend tryouts, they will give you a head start!

Roller derby is great exercise, a fun way to meet people, and it is great to be a part of something that does so much for the community. Come be a part of the world's fastest growing sport!

We can't wait to see you at the clinics and tryouts!

--Bilbo Stabbins