April Skater of the Month: Maniac Jack

Maniac Jack has been with the Dire Skates since the beginning! A blocker, and jammer, Maniac is a powerful force on the track.

I mean, have you seen her skate?

And those shoulders?!

Maniac skates hard and hits harder, not only using herself to hit our opponents, but even throwing her teammates at the other players. No one forgets the first time they get hit by Maniac Jack.

Maniac easily gets her head into the game and works to ensure her teammates are focused alongside her. Though she is also well-known for stacking up penalties--the "jack in the box" is a common sight at our games. Even then she still has a smile on her face!

Maniac is a powerful asset to our team, not only because of her abilities, but because she is an amazing derby sister. She even tried to retire after last season, but we would not let her because we just love her too much!


Coach, The GolfFather, had this to say about Maniac:

What an amazing person Maniac Jack is. She is hard working, busy mom of two very active and athletic kids. Jack is very athletic herself and a very good skater. She has played anywhere we have put her on the track. Blocker, no problem, Pivot, sure, Jammer, "are you sure?", “Yes, Jack, go jam and score some points.” She is most famous probably for Hurtz McGroin’s saying “Jack in the Box” everytime she gets a penalty. Wonder if they would sponsor our penalty box?
She almost retired after last season and I am glad we had all those fans in supporting the “one more year.” I am glad that she is back for 2015 and hopefully beyond. What do you say, Jack?
I have known jack for about 4.5 years now and I am honored to coach a great player, teammate, mom, person, but most of all a great friend!

DJ SMear-O added this:

I love Maniac's glorious powerful ass. It knocks everyone around. It clears holes for me on the track. It looks perfect and round and strong in her shorts. I catch myself in a Maniac Jack booty trance. She may not like her fabulous bottom, but that beautiful badass babe has been busting her bodacious buns for me and everyone else on this team since we became a team. She is a bounty of butt and a force to be reckoned with. I love Maniac Jack. Skating with her has and always will be a pleasure.

RollHer Zombie had this to say about her derby sister:

Maniac Jack, 765, homegrown crazy. I remember drinking wine in her kitchen many moons ago and trying to come up with her tag line. That is just one of many great times we have shared since the very start of the team. Besides my other wife, CA is probably who I have played derby with the most since the team started. I am lucky to not only call her my sister, but one of my dearest, closest friends, who has been there for me through my darkest moments. Manic and I both can say derby saved our souls; Not only for the physical outlet and chance to break down barriers that society puts females in, but the true friendship and love that comes from such an amazing dynamic of women. Some people are reluctant to get to know her, because I think they are intimidated by those big shoulders, lethal hips, and sometimes big mouth. ;) I know under that awesomely brutal persona and seemingly effortless derby ability, she is quite simply amazing. I know she has thought of retirement, but honestly I can't imagine our team without her and I am not looking forward to that day. Mad love for you Maniac.
<3 RollHer Zombie

Maniac Jack photo gallery:

Thanks for all you do, Maniac!

March Skater of the Month: Emily KickNsuM

Emily is a Dire Skates Original; she joined when the team started five years ago! She has been blocking and jamming for the Dire Skates since the beginning. Emily is a naturally good skater and is, as anyone who has watched her knows, wonderful to watch on the track.

Emily's team job is bout-coordinator, meaning she coordinates getting everything planned, reserved, and prepared for bout day. Emily is also a trainer (alongside her derby wife RollHer Zombie), meaning she helps to teach new skaters skating and derby basics, but also helps the other vets hone their skills.

Emily welcomes dedicated players with open arms, helping them learn, but also showing them what to strive for. In addition to her derby skills, Emily is a joy to be around.

Our coach, The GolfFather, had this to say:

"Emily KickNsum grew up a rink rat and put her work as a skater into that of a derby girl. She has a very demanding job as an ER nurse and I think relieves and lets go of all that on the derby track. Emily is a triple threat on the track. She is a great jammer even though she doesn’t like to. She is a ultimate blocker that can keep girls contained for a long time and as a pivot is a big leader on the track. Emily has done a lot off the track as well behind the scenes. She has done fundraising events, handled getting NSO’s, getting everything set with the different venues that we have used for games. She has been a leader on and off the track and has scaled back her responsibilities from the past few years but that doesn’t mean she is any less important to this team. I am glad that I can coach her and more importantly call her a great friend."

Fellow skater, DJ SMear-O, said this:

"She's been dedicated to this team since it's inception. She's part of coaching and training and teaches us all so much. She encourages and inspires and smells awful. She helps put bouts together. She's always got a silly attitude. Stupid, ugly, happy holiday sweaters...she's known for those. She's fun. She's kickass and one of our founding sisters. She's got more skating ability in her pinky toe than I could ever dream to have. And "hot" doesn't begin to cover it. She's amazeballs. And I'm glad she's my sister from another mister...and missus :)"

Emily's little derby sister, Terahrizen, had this to say:

"When I tried out for the team I remember looking around at all the vets and wondering which one would be my "Big". Emily walked in late and I think it was really nice to see her in street clothes because it made her "real". The other girls were all geared up and going drills and that was both amazing and terrifying. Emily talked to me very briefly and it was very calming to be approached by Emily Talbot rather than Emily KickNsum. When I got the call that she actually would be my Big, I was very happy. I learned that she was practically born with skates on her feet and was one of Dire's best players. I had to step it up and make my sister proud!

Emily is very dedicated to the sport and her team mates despite what may be going on in her life outside of derby. I respect that about her. I appreciate the quiet encouragement and the over all support she has given me. The first time I ever went to the gym, Emily invited me to go to some insanely difficult class, it was probably called something like "do burpees and core work until you die." I didn't realize it at the time, but I really needed the gym to improve my game. I am absolutely proud to call her my sister and watching her skate is definitely one of my favorite things. Skating along side her is even better. If I'm jamming, I know she's got my back and I'm not worried how big the other team is or how good they are. I also love her attitude about games, she constantly says "I'm having fun. Lets just worry about having fun and staying together!" I think a lot of new skaters look up to her, while we can't all be born on skates the way Emily was, we all admire her drive and natural ability. She has been really tough on me as her little, and I have a long way to go, but I wouldn't be where I am today without her!"

Emily's derby wife, RollHer Zombie had this to say:

"My beautiful wife, man where do I even start. A heart as big as the hits she doles out on the track. Equal parts beauty and Braun. I absolutely love watching her skate and play the game, almost as much as I love sharing the track with her. Emily being so much younger than me, I use her to gauge my own performance, she definitely keeps me on my toes and pushing.  She is a bulldog on wheels and I have nothing but respect and love for her, quit isn't in her vocabulary.  We have both grown up skating and we love it.  Derby gives us that outlet to bring it to that next level. I look forward to many more years on the track with her by my side.  Love your face off Em!
<3 RollHer Zombie"

 Emily KickNsum photo gallery:

Thanks for all you do, Em!

January Skater of the Month: Jenocide

Jen, or Jenocide, is a blocker for the Dire Skates. She joined the team in June of 2013; her eagerness to skate quickly became dedication to the team--this dedication only continues to grow.

Jenocide works hard both on and off the track and it shows. Not only has she grown as a player, but she has worked hard to become fit and healthy through derby and through her own workouts. Fitness and health are a priority. Because of this, she pushes her teammates to do better and become stronger.

In addition to skating, Jen helps coordinate community events and helps in any way she can behind the scenes (you've even seen her here on the blog a couple of times). 

Jen rarely misses practices or team events, even attending practices when she is sick or injured and cheering us on from the side. Jen's dedication makes her a great teammate and friend and we are glad she is a part of the Dire Skates.





Our coach, the Golffather, had to this to say:

Jen or Jenocide as the derby world knows her is a up and coming skater. Jen started with a team that is no longer in existence. I know that she is the most dedicated skater that we have on the team. Her attendance record is impeccable to the point of being almost perfect since she joined the team. I think she has maybe missed less than a handful of them.
She works very hard both on and off skates. She continues to improve her skills on the track and listens and gets better each time. With everyone she has things that she needs to work on and get better at. This has been her first full season with us and she has learned a lot and will hopefully learn that much more this next season. Jen, thank you for balancing your job, kids, family and becoming a member of the Dire Skates.

Shinnanigans, Jen's friend and former coach, said this:  
 

Jenocide possesses the keys to success. She understands that knowledge and learning are not enough. It takes action.  Action on and off the track. She continuously works on improving her skills, getting stronger and healthier. Her dedication to her team and sport show every time she takes the track. It is a great feeling to see her succeed through the progress she has accomplished.

BadAZZ Mother Cutter, Jen's derby sister, said this:

Jen has come SO far since joining the team. She is very dedicated and always there when you need her. She takes direction well and plays hard. She's a great example of what a new player can strive toward.

Smack Widow, Jen's derby sister, said this:

Passion and dedication are words that can be used to describe Jenocide. Since the beginning of our skating career and even more to this day Jen inspires me. She is one of the hardest workers on the team, and always gives her 100%. During practices her dedication really shows. She is constantly pushing herself past her own limits, physically and mentally. She is like a force that cannot be moved. Her skating and game play have improved immensely since starting out, and her body has changed and developed into what she needs to thrive on the track. Her beautiful transformation into the player she is today gives me and everyone else on the team inspiration to keep pushing. The Dire Skates would absolutely not be the same without her.

Jenocide photo gallery:

Thanks for all you do, Jen!

December Skater of the Month: Lish D Lish

Alicia, or Lish D Lish, is a jammer for the Dire Skates. Lish has been with the team for four years-- her dedication to the team evidenced by her time with the team and her amazing performance every time she hits the track.


Lish is one of our star jammers and one of our most recognizable players not only because of her seemingly natural ability as a skater and jammer, but because of her her obvious love of the game. She is always willing to take pictures with her fans after the game, showing off the smile that rarely seems to leave her face.


If you were at our game against A-Town on November 15th, you saw all of this in action. Lish played her heart out just as she always does!


Instead of telling you about her skills, I will let others explain how valuable she is to the team.




Our coach, the Golfather, had to this to say:

Alicia, or, as everyone in the local derby community knows her as, Lish D Lish is a great skater and is improving every time that she laces up her skates. She listens well and takes what us coaches tell her to heart. For those who were at the November game, Lish probably played her best overall game. We had to control her emotions a few times, but that just shows that she has the heart for the game and wants to do her best. She has also had to overcome a few injuries. With a few added tools to her game she could be a huge threat on the jammer line for us.

Stubborn Itch, Lish's derby wife said this:

What can I say? If some of you didn't know, Lish is my derby wife and always will be no matter what. Not only my derby wife but, dancing partner, close friend, and side kick. When Lish first came to the team, I remember her try-outs were very impressive! You could tell she was a skater! During try-outs she didn't show any shyness. It was all confidence and determination. She is a people-person, dedicated, very tough, and a confident woman. Lish is always wearing a smile even on her worst days. I knew we would hit it off because she has those outbursts sometimes. That told me she is as real as real can get. No cover up on who she is really is. Her skating skills have always been extremely excellent, but if you know derby, we all know that derby is a different style from casual skating. With that being said, since on the team Lish's skating skills have gotten even better. I will let you all in on a little secret that even Lish didn't know. Lots of us know how ridiculously fast Lish is. Well, being able to skate with her on the track during practices has helped me achieve a goal that I set for myself. I set the goal that I would be as fast as her one day! Not sure that I have completely accomplished her speed yet, but I have achieved it to the point I am happy with myself and she is all the one to thank for that. So I personally want to thank her for that! Lots of people and new skaters look up to her for her skating skills, dedication, determination, toughness, confidence, and always wearing a beautiful smile on her face. Congratulations on working hard enough to get noticed to be the team's skater of the month!

I'm so very proud of you and keep up the good work! I love you!

Shelby, Lish's sister, added this:

I am proud of Alicia. She has came so far in her skating career. She is the Michael Jordan of this game. It is amazing being a twin with Alicia because together we can do anything. There have been many times when Alicia's fans have come up to me asking for an autograph. I smile and tell them "I am not Alicia, but I will tell her you said hi." The street goes both ways people come up to Alicia and able her about fixing automobiles and riding a motorcycle. She kindly apologizes and says, "No, I am not Shelby, but I will tell her you said hi." I am proud of Alicia and I believe that the rest of the family is also. Keep it up, Alicia.!

Maniac Jack, added this about her derby sister:

jam skating might be her groove, but she has fast moves on the flat track. Over the years of skating with Lish one things comes to mind: she always has a smile on her face. And she is one hell of a jammer. Okay, that was two. There is more--Lish might be little, but she is mighty. Even in practice she will take a beating and come back for more. To end this I have to say I have never been more excited than when I saw her hip check the other jammer during our last bout. Thanks for being my teammate and derby sister!

Here are a few photos from our bout against A-Town that show Lish in action, but you can check out more photos here:

Thanks for all you do, Lish!

November Skater of the Month: Bilbo Stabbins

 The Dire Skates blog is typically written by Jessika or “Bilbo Stabbins". She takes care of the blog, takes votes and writes “Skater of the Month” posts, updates the FB page and a plethora of other things for the team. This month, however, Bilbo has been selected as the Skater of the Month and as her Sister, I have stepped in to write it for her. 

As Jessika’s “Big Sister” it is an absolute honor to write this entry about her. In roller derby, when a new skater comes on it is customary for that skater to be assigned a veteran skater to be her (or his) “big”. My job as Jessika’s big was to build a relationship with the new skater and answer any questions she may have, to spend time making sure she felt comfortable as a new addition and encourage her as she transitioned from new recruit, to team member. That relationship has evolved from a derby “assignment” to a real friendship. 

I first met Jessika in high school and became reacquainted with her in a Zumba class where she expressed interest in the upcoming Dire tryouts. Though apprehensive in the beginning, she has proved to be a strong, positive player who is willing to go the extra mile to be the best player and teammate she can be. Besides being a wife and mother of 2 wonderfully behaved and adorable boys, Jessika is a professor, a student pursuing a doctorate, and a blocker for the Dire Skates. She writes this blog and helps in pretty much every working group the team has....Aka: Derby Unicorn.  

Fellow skater Gina “RollHer Zombie” had this to say about Bilbo:

“What can I say, [Bilbo] is amazing. Her intelligence in life certainly comes through in her approach to the game. Although physically she is not where she maybe thinks she should be, I see her improve each time she hits the track. She truly does accept constructive criticism and pointers and she acts on them.”……”Our children are the same age and I truly enjoy our time both on and off the track. I am so glad she is part of my derby family.”

Dire Skates coach, “The Golf Father” has been coaching Bilbo for over a year now. He had this to say about her:

“Bilbo is a wonderful addition the the team both on and off the track. She has shown a lot of drive and is willing to learn and grow in the sport. Off the track she does a lot with the teams Facebook page and game day activities. I am looking forward to seeing where she might take herself in the game."

Fellow skater Emily KickNSum said:

"I love how she uses her talents to highlight the team in the blog. I also love how she is working hard on her PhD and still makes time for derby. She also pushes the team to learn more about derby by inviting people over to watch derby at her house."

Dire Skater, EnTruder says:

 "Bilbo Stabbins is one of the nicest and most giving players on the team. She is always    available to help out, and works hard during practice. One of the things I most admire about Bilbo is that she balances work, family, friends and is still so committed to derby that she finds extra time to skate the trail, workout in the gym etc. Thats dedication. Bilbo has a great sense of humor, and is possibly the person I see most often in my professional life. Usually it's kinda weird to see my derby sisters at work (because you want to hug, hip check, etc) but we laugh about it and move on"

Congrats, Bilbo and thank you for all that you do!

October Skater of the Month: RollHer Zombie

Gina, or as she is known to us, RollHer Zombie, is both a blocker and jammer for the Dire Skates.  Gina is one of the founding members of the team and her dedication has held strong over the years. Her dedication is most evident in her ability to motivate her teammates to push themselves to do their very best.

On the track Zombie is a powerful and valuable player, a crowd favorite. Off the track, Gina is in charge of our finances, which means she keeps track of money spent for bouts, our skater dues, taxes, merchandise, and our donations to local charities and organizations. In addition to this, she is a trainer, which means she works hard to whip us into shape, leading workout sessions outside of practice, off-skates practices, and often leading or joining in on trail skates.

Additionally, Gina can always be counted on to listen and support her derby sisters. Gina is a considerate friend and teammate who often puts others and her team before herself.



Assistant Coach, Mr. BadAZZ had this to say:

Zombie is a big part of Dire Skates. She is a trainer, handles financing, and is a lot of help with the team merchandise. She also gives me a helping hand when Coach can't make to practice. She helps me by running drills and conditioning for the team. She hits hard and skates fast. Thanks for all you do, Gina.

Goregon says of RollHer Zombie:

Gina is a natural leader who gets results when leading the team in drills, exercise, and on the track. She's also a tireless worker, balancing the books and monitoring our team accounts. It doesn't hurt that she's got an amazing personality.

DJ Smear-O had this to say:

Gina has been totally dedicated to this team since its inception. I look up to her in mad ways. She's awesome on wheels and a rocking chick with a tender heart. She's a sister and friend to me as well as a tough as nails trainer who whips my saggy, floppy ass into shape

Emily KickNsuM added this mushy bit about her derby wife:

Gina has always been one of my biggest rivals on the track, even though we are on the same team. The Dire Skates used to host scrimmages against each other and we were always on opposite teams and it felt like jammed against each other over and over. Even though pinned against each other some how we fell in love, or I did anyway. That’s how I found what we call a derby wife. She is that person on the team that pushes me harder at practice; we see eye to eye on most team decisions, but most importantly she has became someone I can call for anything. It's something I love about derby because I found a great friend that I believe will be a friend beyond derby careers and crazy life changes, someone that I don’t think I would have ever became friends with if not for roller derby. "Roller Derby saved my soul," is a quote used often… but its not just roller derby the sport that saved my soul its skaters on the team like RollHer Zombie that saved my soul.

 Thank you for all you do, Gina!

September Skater of the Month: Terahrizen

Sasquatch

Terah, or as she is known on the track, Terahrizen, is both a blocker and a jammer for the Dire Skates. Terah is small, but mighty in both physical and mental stamina. She works hard to get what she wants, even attending extra training and hitting the gym with teammates whenever possible.

Terah is in charge of marketing, which involves making and disseminating flyers and working on social media, among other things. She coordinates and delegates to her marketing minions who gladly do her bidding.

Terah is also mom to junior skater Korah the Destroyer.

In addition to being a great player and doing great work for the team, Terah serves as a mentor to her current teammates and, more specifically, to the newbies as they get acclimated to roller derby and their new team. Terah does so much for the team, though, as noted below, her strengths lie in what she makes those around her feel they are capable of accomplishing.



BadAZZ Mothercutter had this to say:

Terah has come so far since she joined the team. She always has a positive attitude and wants to motivate others to better themselves. She is a great example for the newbs to look up to, a perfect example of what hard work and dedication can do.

Our coach The Golffather said this:

Terah maybe small but she can pack a punch. She has been one of the most dedicated players on the team. She puts in more time on and off the track that I know. Getting better is something she strives to do and she by far is doing it. Not only is she so dedicated on the track she does so much behind the scenes that no one sees plus juggles her job, 2 kids, and her photography business. If you need something done she will bend over backwards to get it done. I am proud of her for what she has done and is doing. I am looking forward to seeing what's next for her. I am proud to be her coach.

And Terah's big sister, Emily KickNsum said this:

When Terah joined the team I was named her big sister. She has made me proud ever since. Terah seeks out opportunities to improve her derby knowledge and skill constantly. She is a great teacher and is always reaching out to show others what helped her when she was learning specific moves. Even though she is small, she has a huge heart and I am proud to have her on my team.

Thanks for all you do, Terah!

May Skater of the Month: Dragon Ballzy

Dragon Ballzy, or as she is also known, Katey, is a blocker and, as of late, a jammer for the Dire Skates. Though she just joined in 2013, she has clearly has a natural talent for derby as she has shown great improvement in the short time she has been on the track with the team.

Ballzy is always smiling and willing to geek out with her fellow sisters at practice, making her a wonderful, positive energy on the team, but she is also a force on the track. She hits hard, falls hard, and plays hard for her team. To illustrate, Ballzy scored more points for us in the last away bout than any other jammer. She works hard to improve her skating and it shows!

Off the track is an artist who just so happens to also make pizza to support her derby habit.


Here is what our coach, The Golffather, had to say about Ballzy:

 "Dragon Ballzy is up and comer for the Dire Skates. She is coming into her own and coming out of her shell. She has been known to make the big hit and recently she has been starting to jam. Most of the time you see a jammer that is small and agile, well "Ballzy" isn't the smallest skater or the most agile but she can make her own hole. It will be fun to see where she can go from here as long as she puts the time and effort into it."


RollHer Zombie had this to say: 

"I dig Katey's skate or die attitude. She has improved tremendously and I love to watch her skate. She is easygoing, always a total sweetheart, and always a total badass. I <3 her so hard"


BadAZZ MotherCutter added this:

"Ballzy is an amazing person and a great player. She's a sweet person, but don't let her smile fool you. Her skills have improved tremendously since she started with the team. I very much enjoy having her both on the track and as a friend"

Thanks for all you do, Ballzy!

Derby love

April Skater of the Month: DJ Smear-O

DJ Smear-O, or Jessica Leigh as she is also known, is a jammer and blocker for the Dire Skates who has been with the team for three years. Since her first bout in October 2011, Smear-O has been a strong player, but she also has a strong, outgoing personality. Her tiny frame packs a punch and if she hits you, you'll feel (and see) the results for quite some time afterward. Smear-O communicates with us constantly while on the track, helping us become better players and boosting morale with her antics. She also helps with marketing and makes super-rad radio spots for the team while also helping get us bout-ready in many other ways. In addition to her skill as a player, Smear-O's sense of humor and personality are a big part of what makes her a unique and valuable member of our team. At any given practice (in addition to bruises) we get poop jokes, Star Wars references, and I am pretty sure she never stops talking about food.

Smear-O also has an adorable family. Look at that face--and she isn't even the cutest one of the bunch! But really beyond derby, Smear-O is dedicated to her family. This dedication spills over into her derby family as seen in her passion for the game and for her derby sisters.


Here is what our coach, The Golffather, had to say about Smear-O:

"Jess, or Smear-O as we all know her, has become a versatile player on the team. She  was mostly a jammer when I started but has become a double threat with her blocking abilities. She is a fun player to coach and is always wanting to learn; sometimes she might not like what I have to say, but she takes it in stride and grows with it. She is amazing with what she does behind the scenes as well that no one sees except us with the team. Being a radio DJ she is a great communicator and every team needs a few of those. She is a great family person and I for one am glad the she is part of this derby family."

GOREgon also had this to say:

The first time I met DJ Smear-O was when I, as a fresh meat skater, went to the team photoshoot. She had on these crazy awesome custom made Chuck Taylors that had her derby name embroidered on them and were in the team colors. She was also really, really funny and warm. Since then, I have really loved being around her and learning things from her as well as building camaraderie with her."

Dave Snow, aka Dire Skates team announcer Hurtz McGroin, added this:

Jessica A.K.A. DJ Smear-O is a lot of fight in a small package. There is an old saying that applies very well to her. It says: "Never measure your opponent by their size, their strength, or their speed. Only measure your opponent by the opposition it takes to discourage them." She will never back down or give up. Actually, she somehow takes a big challenge, and turns it into motivation. Her best weapon is that smile. If you fall for that, you're already dead (you just don't know it yet.)

Thank you for all you do, Smear-O!

Derby love!

March Skater of the Month: BadAZZ Mother Cutter

Kellye, aka BadAZZ Mother Cutter, has been blocking with the team for over three years. Kellye also has a skating background and a history of jamming and speedskating. In addition to skating, her team job is "Goodwill and Communication," which means she does a lot! She texts us all and keeps us up to date on things, she works to mediate problems between skaters, talks with skaters who are having troubles in life (derby-related or otherwise), and has been very welcoming of all the new skaters to the team. BadAZZ also makes goody bags for the other teams and makes the MVP trophies. A lot of Kellye's work is behind the scenes or one-on-one with other skaters. Because of this, her hard work often goes unnoticed.

Kellye is only 1/4 of the BadAZZ derby team, though: Mr. BadAZZ is assistant coach and she has Baby BadAZZ and BadAZZ Brat on The Skate Aways.

In addition to derby, BadAZZ does hair and....well, she mostly does derby stuff.


Here is what our coach, The Golffather, had to say about BadAZZ:

"Kellye or Bad Azz has become a great asset to the team. She has worked hard on her skates and getting better day by day. She has become a quiet leader on the track. She has taken on roles off skates that makes the team operation run smoother than they otherwise would. I am glad she is a part of the Dire Skates."

I, Bilbo, would like to add my two cents:

I specifically remember meeting Kellye and thinking she seemed quite intimidating. She has a stern demeanor and remains straight-faced much of the time. But I quickly discovered that she is actually the nicest person and you also know she will never lie to you, which is appreciated. She dishes out tough love and is always honest and she cares about her derby sisters more than anything. Once she yelled at me for not wearing my Dire Skates shirt when we were out at an event. I'd only tried out a few weeks prior and didn't quite feel like part of the team yet. She said that in fact I was and I should never go out without Dire gear again. Duly noted. I felt welcomed. And a little bit assaulted. It was perfect. Also, she waxes my mustache and I can't help but assume she likes doing her job because she likes torturing people and I appreciate that.

enTRUdir added this:

When it comes to picking a derby wife, you look for someone who personifies everything that you yourself want to be in derby. So, it was a 'no brainer' to ask Kellye to be mine. Kellye is the most level-headed person on the team, on and off track. She plays hard and everyone respects her 'cool head' and decision-making. As our goodwill/communication person, she heads off a lot of drama and really keeps the team together. On the track, I truly love blocking with Kellye. Just a look will tell you what she's going to do, and how she's going to do it. Now, with the advent of our juniors and Tony as our new Asst. Coach, it's really become a "family affair" for the Tenneys and I couldn't be more thrilled than to see them all there on the floor. We are truly blessed to have Kellye and her family with us - and I hope she stays my derby wife for a long time!

Mr. BadAZZ had this to say about his BadAZZ wife:

It's so much fun to be able to coach and skate with my wife. I am waiting for her to lay me out with a big hit at practice one of these days. I am very proud of all that she does with derby on and off the track; she is one of the best blockers on the team and is someone for all the derby team to come to if they need anything. I know she loves derby and always will.

Thank you for all you do, BadAZZ.

Derby love.

February Skater of the Month: The GOREgon

The GOREgon, aka Nat, blocks for the Dire Skates. Nat tried out in the late summer of 2013. She did not come during regular tryouts, but instead attended a practice and skated with the team because she wanted to see what things were all about after seeing Bilbo Stabbins and Ab Fab Eddie's excitement about the sport. Those first few practices were tough, but she kept coming back. Nat has gone from being an interested spectator to a true force on the team.

The GOREgon is new to the team, but that does not mean she hasn't taken up some derby duties. In fact, it is difficult to see how these things were getting done at all before she arrived. GOREgon has worked diligently on our headshots, group photos, and other pictures for the team. The new website is her domain as well (we know you can't see it, but we can and it looks great!). Nat has also been working hard with others to get us new jerseys, focusing both on the design and the logistics of ordering. In addition to team duties, The GOREgon works hard on herself; she is working hard mentally and physically to become the best player she can be and as my teammates and I can see, she has come so far!

In addition to the countless hours The GOREgon spends on derby, she works, reads all the books, and crafts all the things (in fact she even crafts derby things, making necklaces, shorts, and skirts for her derby sisters!).

Here is what our coach, The Golffather, had to say about The GOREgon: 

"Nat, "The GOREgon" is probably one of the most improved from when she first put on skates at that 1st practice. Her endurance is extremely improved and she continues the hard work both on and off the track. She is a great asset to the team and I am glad that she is with the Dire Skates."

And Terahrizin added this:

"I would say Nat is one of the most improved new skaters we have. The first time I met Nat she spent a fair amount of practice time laying on the floor complaining and in pain. The next few times were the same. Eventually (pretty quickly actually) she spend more time on her feet and talking about what she could do to get better. That is what derby is all about. Few of us are natural athletes. Falling down is ok, crying is ok, puking is ok……quitting is not.

Not only is Nat getting better and better on her skates, but she is also a major contributor to behind the scenes stuff for the team. Helping with pictures, working on the website, sewing shorts and skirts for teammates, working out extra and motivating everyone."

Thanks for all you do, GOREgon!

January Skater of the Month: enTRUdir

Editor's note: This is a new feature! We'd like to honor a Dire Skates member each month in order to show all the behind the scenes and on the track effort the players put in. As we have previously written about, derby takes a lot of effort and a lot of DIY and sometimes the unicorns are actually members of the team. Look for a new "Skater of the Month" early each month!

enTRUdir, aka Trudi, blocks for the Dire Skates. Trudi tried out for the Dire Skates in January 31, 2010 (which was only the third meeting/practice for the team in the first round of tryouts for the team ever) after watching Naptown play the night prior in a bout called "Scar Wars." She is now our fearless leader, the glue that holds us together

enTRUdir is the official convener for the team, meaning she coordinates meetings and votes and makes sure we all do our jobs. She is basically a goddess. (Have you tried wrangling 20+ women into doing something? Not easy.) She has also been a fabulous mentor to us new skaters, constantly talking with us on the track and off during practice to help us grow as skaters. Trudi is level-headed, and serves as a great mediator. She records videos to recap our meetings to make sure we all know what is happening (because notes...who reads things? Wait...). And she reminds us that we can't cuss or be vulgar around the junior skaters...as much as we hate that, we know she is right. You know what, Trudi does so much that I don't even know what else she contributes (coordinating, logos, merch decisions...she's involved in all of it). enTRUdir is an invaluable member of the team and for that, we love her.

In addition to this, she works full time and is the mother to junior skater PUKE Skywalker who, I must say, has some big shoes to fill.

Here is what our coach, The Golffather, had to say about enTRUdir:

"Trudi…..what can I say about Trudi….she is one of the most thoughtful hard working people for the team. A lot of what she does in the background and doesn’t get seen directly, but you definitely see it indirectly. She is a quiet leader and is always willing to get out of her of her comfort zone on the track. She is always willing to help others. She doesn’t look to be in the limelight, she doesn’t want it. I am glad that I can say that I coach her, but even more, I call her a friend."

And Emily KickNsuM added this:

"Trudi is one of the older members and on the team and I don’t mean age, I mean the length of time she has spent with the team. Trudi has always pushed the team to hold to higher values and be a positive influence in our community. Her values off the track are very much the same on the track. Though she might not be the fastest skater on the team or have the hardest hit, Trudi is a solid blocker for the Dire Skates. More importantly she uses team work, knowledge, and communication on the track to get even more accomplished than big hits. I have several special memories of Trudi--one of which includes that we both went to the first Dire Skates tryouts and tried out together. To sum up the memory, she has come a long way from a girl in blue jeans with brown clown rental skates on."

Thank you for all you do, enTRudir.

Derby love.